2023.04.DisappearingMoment
I have no stomach for people who whine about identity or gender politics. We need to fight until America stops abusing people for their demographic characteristics. This isn't about that.
What bothers me is identity medicine. Many of us take comfort in collecting diagnoses. Seasonal Affective Disorder. IT Band Syndrome. Allergies. Sleep Apnea. Acid Reflux. Restless Legs Syndrome. Gingivitis. Sensitive Skin.
I'm not suggesting these conditions aren't real. They're real. They explain things about us. Treating them offers us hope.
It's that hope that concerns me. I see myself becoming dependent on that hope. Codependent? Another diagnosis.
I may have self-diagnosed last weekend, a practice I avoid. The assessments I used were inconclusive, as are my feelings about it. The condition isn't something I judge in others. It's more a question of my identity.
An analogy. How would you feel if you found out one of your biological parents might not be? Would you want to know for sure?
It wouldn't change anything. Your corporeal body. Your experiences. No one worth a damn would change their opinion of you.
And yet.
There may be explanatory power. You might go easier on yourself. Change your plans a bit. You might find new wells of forgiveness.
Would you want to know the answer? I'm not sure how I feel about considering the question.
Welcome to April 2023’s Disappearing Moment, an inventory of my experiences. I hope you enjoy it.
Podcasts
- The Coldest Case in Laramie (I Liked It): Do True Crime podcasts have anything new to offer? This case is a metaphor for that question.
- Doctors of Running (I Liked It): Biomechanics. Running shoes. Fast, beautiful nerds.
- Holy Week (I Loved It): I thought I understood the King assassination.
- That Intimate Feeling (I Liked It): A poignant, unguarded debut. I want to hear more.
Nerdy Software
I use CotEditor for coding, Markdown, and other text files. Good news: it's open source, beautiful, and active. Bad news: it's only for Macs.
Bougie Products
For countertop microwaves, go LG. Most companies rebrand Midea. LG makes their own, they work better, cost the same, and they're better designed.
Personal Finance and Investing
Why Investment Complexity Is Not Your Friend by Amy C. Arnott is clear, brief, and useful. Take five minutes and save money, time, and worry.
Reading
Aubrey Gordon, You Just Need to Lose Weight (2023) (I Loved It): Debunking myths about how our bodies look, how they work, and how we treat each other.
Albums 21–27 (of 129)
- Beastie Boys, Check Your Head (1992): My virginal fear of intercourse echoed my fear of certain albums, including this one. The idea of irreversible change making what I loved irrelevant.
- REM, Automatic for the People (1992): Morrissey a lovedrunk Liberal daddy. Cobain wizened and vegan and boring. It sounds good to me now. Very good.
- Air, Moon Safari (1998): Proto-Balearic beach music. Dancing at the golden hour as August sets into Eternal September.
- Girl Talk, Feed the Animals (2008): Real cool is making everyone else feel smart.
- Danger Mouse and Daniele Luppi, Rome (2011): Danger Mouse was Ted Lasso before Ted Lasso. He has a vision for process and outcome. Part of it is adaptability.
- Lianne la Havas, Is Your Love Big Enough? (2012): A soundtrack in search of superhero movie to score.
- Ooga Boogas, Ooga Boogas (2013): Rock musicians are the original fan fiction community. Discuss.
Thanks for spending a few moments with me. I look forward to corresponding again next month.
Brett
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